Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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