It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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