u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
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Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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