so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
I won't apologize to a one balled man
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.