As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
