Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
