So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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