Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
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