I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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