I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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