Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
