Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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