I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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