Duck Duck Cougar?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I just forgot I was standing up.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
