Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i just google imaged poop.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
