I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
