I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
