the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
