Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Randomize
