I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
