i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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