My hand turned me down
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
