Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
