No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Randomize
