just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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