apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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