i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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