the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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