you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
