You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
