Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
and you fell through a lawn chair
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Randomize
