his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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