I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
