Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I looked at my own cervix.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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