New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
