i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
