They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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