Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
