The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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