No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
you would pick up someone in the library
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
