So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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