i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I am available for nakedness
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize