My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize