AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize