Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
