i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
operation harelip BJ is a go
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize