and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
