we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
