I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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