I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
